Sara smash!

上次我让你买那条蓝色的裙子，
Shàng cì wǒ ràng nǐ mǎi nà tiáo lán sè de qúnzi,
Last time I asked you to buy that blue dress,
.
为什么你不买？
wèishénme nǐ bú mǎi?
why the hell will you not buy that dress?!
.
因为我觉得我的身材没有那么好，
Yīnwèi wǒ juéde wǒ de shēncái méiyǒu nàme hǎo,
Because I think my figure is not that good,
.
穿起来不好看。
chuān qǐlái bu hǎokàn.
it doesn’t look good on me.
.
谁说的？
Shéi shuō de?
No way! Who said it?
.
然后我让你发朋友圈，
Ránhòu wǒ ràng nǐ fā péngyou quān,
Then I asked you to post [a photo of you in that dress] on Friends Circle,
.
问问大家买不买，
wènwen dàjiā mǎi bú mǎi,
and ask everyone whether you should by it or not.
.
他们说什么？
tāmen shuō shénme?
what did they say?
.
他们说我怀孕了，
Tāmen shuō wǒ huáiyùn le,
They said that I’m pregnant.
,
说我的肚子很大。
shuō wǒ de dùzi hěn dà.
they said my belly is very big.
.
好。那你生气吗？
Hǎo. Nà nǐ shēngqì ma?
Ok. So are you angry?
.
我不生气,
Wǒ bù shēngqì.
I’m not angry,
.
因为我的心里已经把他们杀死了。
yīnwèi wǒ de xīnlǐ yǐjīng bǎ tāmen shā sǐ le.
because inside my heart I’ve already killed them.
.
杀死。
Shā sǐ.
Kill.
.
杀死了。
Shā sǐ le.
Killed.
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对，很好。
Duì, hěn hǎo.
Yes, very good.
.
你要和我一起上中文课吗？
Nǐ yào hé wǒ yìqǐ shàng Zhōngwén kè ma?
Do you want to take Chinese Class with me?
.
不要。
Bú yào.
I don’t want to.
.
对了，如果是你，
Duìle, rúguǒ shì nǐ,
By the way, if it was you,
.
你生气吗？
nǐ shēngqì ma?
would you be angry?
.
我当然生气啦。
Wǒ dāngrán shēngqì la.
Of course I’d be angry.
.
我会先给他们一个白眼，
Wǒ huì xiān gěi tāmen yí gè báiyǎn,
First I would give them a look of disdain,
.
然后说“关你屁事”！
ránhòu shuō “guān nǐ pì shì”!
then I’d say “Mind your own damn business” !
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那还是没有我厉害,
Nà hái shì méiyǒu wǒ lìhai.
Then that’s still not as harsh as me,
.
因为我已经把他们杀死了。
yīnwèi wǒ yǐjīng bǎ tāmen shā sǐ le.
because I’ve already killed them.
.
杀死。
Shā sǐ.
Kill.